By Francis K. Githinji
Shy love happens all the time as a result of unwillingness to love. Hesitation to love is what is referred to as shy love. There are a lot of unhappy relationships out there due to the fear of giving it all to a relationship. This is usually a psychological problem with people who have been hurt before. They fear that their emotional and financial investment towards a relationship might be in vain. As a result they give unfulfilling resources to a relationship. My relationship advice is, if you decide to love, you should fully invest in the relationship. Otherwise do not enter into a new relationship if you were hurt by a previous one. It is a bad practice which is exercised by people who lack good self identity.
If you are a divorced man or woman, do not carry your previous baggage in to the new relationship. If we give out our love generously, it will always come back to us. Many people feel unloved because what they give out to a romantic relationship is usually shy love. This will always result into unhappy relationships and you will live an unsatisfied life of feeling unlovable or unloving. A good relationship advice is that, do not shy away from expressing love to a loved one. Give it all and you will be amazed by the good returns. People are different and you should not crucify one person for the sins of another. If you trusted someone and you ended up being betrayed, learn to trust all the time but give your yourself enough time to recover from the previous heartbreak.
Relationship advice concerning break ups always suggest that a victim should get a close confidant to take him/her through this hard time. You might feel hatred but a relationship counselor or a close friend assists in positive thinking. There are people who have been hurt a million times but they still believe in love. They have never attempted to give shy love even after their predicaments. Unhappy relationships have never been a part of their love life. At least they enjoy their relationships the short time that it lasts. People who have suffered from unhappy relationships have abnormal relations with animals. This was proved in a recent study. There are people who prefer to be more attached to dogs and cows than with human beings. Some of the abnormal sexual relationships between animals are men are extreme repercussions of heartbreak.
Unhappy relationships which are as a result of shared shy love can take a turning point if relationship advice is adequately provided. There are partners who hold back their feelings in fear of being rejected or heart broken. For instance many men are aware of their most sensitive parts of the body but are not willing to help their women please them. They fear that if the woman lets them down they will be left feeling rejected and embarrassed. If only there can be communication without fear, unique love can easily be found. As a loving couple, you should be able to correct each other without fear. Never revenge and always talk the truth. By all these true love will certainly replace shy love.
Francis K. Githinji Is An Online Dating Expert. His Latest Project Shy Love Shows How The Power Of Online Dating Can Be Harnessed Internationally and With Great Success, Or You Could Post Your Valued Comments On His Blog At Shy Love
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Monday, July 28, 2008
The Effects Of Shy Love In Relationships
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Wednesday, June 18, 2008
Relationships Are Above All
By Moshee Net
Wealth, time, friends and family are considered to be the most important things in ones life. And all these factors fall under a single parameter called relationship. It is the fact that when you work on relationships, the rest will follow. Relationships are the key to being successful and living the life to the fullest.
MAN- THE SOCIAL ANIMAL
Every one would have studied in high school that man is a social animal. What does that actually mean? It means that, human beings are social creatures who need to constantly meet and interact with people and create relationships with them. Interaction and communication through certain relationships are the qualities of a human being and these relationships are those which make humans different from animals.
BENEFITS OF SOUND RELATIONSHIP
Relationships are what our lives are made up of and happy relationships are very much needed for a happy and satisfied life. A man’s mental health, happiness, self-esteem and the ability to work is greatly influenced by relationships. However, an effective networking is needed to build meaningful relationships. Networking can be well defined as, "identification and building of relationships for the purpose of sharing information, opportunities and resources. Remember that the most powerful asset in the 21st century is nothing but relationship. Your ability to shape the relationship is the factor that will help to determine your level of success in life.
Relationships shape well when you fully agree with the fact that there is inherent value in every human being and every human relationship. However networking works the best when you understand the fact that there are very little you can achieve or have in life without working with other people.
HAPPY LIFE
A relationship can be a great way learning about yourselves and others. Good relationship makes you feel safe and supported. It also helps one to share ideas and feelings, laugh and enjoy someone’s company Relationships bring happiness because, shared joy is double joy and shared sorrow is half sorrow.
BOTTOM-LINE
Build healthy relationships to make a happier living. Nowadays there are lots of mediums available to build sound relationships. Ranging from Internet chats and dating websites to night clubs, there are lots of platforms to get the desired type of relationship you need. Don’t wait for relationships to come to you, you should go to it. So what are you going to do to begin building relationships today? Visiting a night club or spending some happy hours in e-mail chats? Whatever it may be, get it done soon because procrastination is the greatest robber of relationship!
The author writes articles on relationships. For more information about San Fernando Valley Singles, Glendale singles, Studio City Singles, Beverly Hills Singles can be found on the net.
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Sharing Space and Time in a Relationship
By Alison Sardelli
Perhaps one of the most difficult aspects of a relationship is the changing of behavior which is suited to only the individual and not the couple. Many people have little desire to change the style in which they live in order to accommodate a new person and in some cases have great difficulty adapting to any compromise at all.
Making an effort to appreciate and taking the time to be considerate of one’s partner are obvious changes a single person must make when entering into a relationship. Focusing on the sharing of actual space and time can be more difficult to pinpoint as a source of anxiety in a relationship, because one often takes the smaller issues, however many, for granted.
Part One: From "Myspace" to "Ourspace":
Decorating: Whether a person is moving into another’s residence, or the couple seeks out a new location to begin their life in; all people need to have space in their home that is comfortable. Many disagreements take place on the subject of décor alone, especially when one person has a more dominant presence in the relationship. It is typical that women, (or the more feminine partner of the couple,) tend to take charge of the majority of decoration; which for many couples works well until the alternate partner feels as though no spot in their home reflects their personality. Without a comfortable home, or place in the home, many people tend to become agitated and seek to separate themselves from their partner by staying out late or avoiding the home in general. It is wise to always consider one’s partner, even if one finds their taste to be disagreeable, when creating a living environment. When a home becomes overwhelmingly one sided in its’ décor it can reflect an enormous lack of communication and understanding in the relationship, which can lead to many other difficulties.
Respecting Privacy: Even during the most romantic and enjoyable periods of a relationship couples will often find that they each need a little time to themselves. Respecting each other’s privacy and need for this personal time is an essential component in a relationship and the lack of either can present many problems. Wishing to have one’s privacy does not mean that one wishes to be secretive or to keep hidden certain aspects of one’s life; often it allows both individuals to retain the personality traits and mental introspection that indeed helps to create a healthy line of new communication between the two people.
Visitors and Friends: In an ideal situation neither partner would befriend an individual that the other partner found objectionable; however, often friendships that were founded before the relationship began can be difficult to maintain during its’ coarse when those friends have been previously accustom to having a single friend; likewise the partner in the relationship built a friendship(s) as a single person and may also find the transition difficult to navigate. When referring to shared space it is incredibly important to consider one’s partner. Those people that might previously have encouraged friends to drop in unannounced may find that with addition of a partner this behavior is unacceptable. Problems caused when one partner keeps a friend that the other partner particularly dislikes can also be a great source of stress when that friend is invited into the home the couple shares.
One of the most famous clichés of today’s society, when referring to the average couple, is that the male must ask the female’s permission to invite friends into their home; in turn, it is a common complaint amongst males that they feel suffocated by this demand and tend to idealize a single life in which no permission need be granted. Personally, I find this to be a ridiculous power struggle in which the male is made to look like a child and the female a controlling shrew. When one shares a home with their partner is it polite to ask if their partner might have any objections to a visitor, not because permission need be given, but simply because it is polite to consider the plans of a person one lives with. If the visitor should be one that is greatly disliked by a member of the couple, discussing the reasons for this dislike together and without hostility can be of great assistance. Perhaps in extreme cases a particular friend should not be invited into the home and should be visited elsewhere if the individual and the objecting partner are very uncomfortable with each other, but this is often an extreme case that can be brought to a more reasonable conclusion if discussed rationally.
Respective Chores: Though seemingly an easy problem to divide chores amongst two people this problem can be the source of many difficulties and agitation if responsibilities are neglected. More often than an individual purposely refusing to aid in the maintaining of the home, one finds that the two members do not agree on how the maintaining should be accomplished or what the overall standards should be. Again this topic is one that can be easily discussed if addressed calmly and not neglected; if one member constantly "cleans up" after another for example, eventually arguments are likely to occur before the issue address in a reasonably manner. Be sure to assign tasks that both people feel comfortable with, along with a standard that can be agreed upon to avoid needless agitation.
Entertainment in the Home: With a wide variety of home entertainment possibilities it is only natural that many couples may find that they have different interests. In some cases couples will adapt by taking an interest in each other’s activities so that they can better share the space they live in; when the desired activities conflict it is important to remember that when it comes to entertainment all is a matter of opinion and that the space must be shared.
A classic example of this conflict over space sharing might be one that has been often seen on popular sitcoms: The male in the couple wishes to place a pool table or other such "gaming" furniture in a spare bedroom, the female wishes to make up the room with more traditional furnishings that have a tendency to be very feminine in looks; the outcome of this seemingly comical situation is often that the female refers to the males wishes as "childish" and that her style is the more "grown-up" of the two and should therefore be implemented. This kind of blatant disregard for one partner’s wishes maybe over looked on television, but it not so lightly felt in real life. To indicate that a source of entertainment is childish and therefore is unacceptable to request is an assumption that could be applied to any situation if the culture or society called for it to be. The furnishing of a room in flowery curtains and a matching bed might be called practical or might just as easily be compared to the familiar ritual of a "girl’s tea party." Arguments for which partner has the more practical idea, the better idea or simply resorting to insulting each other’s ideas are not a productive ways to either decorate or relax in a home. Instead one should always be ready to discuss the pros and cons of ideas from either person, so that together they may find a reasonable way to share the space needed for those activities which help to relieve stress and bring joy to their lives.
When it comes to your partner’s interests: try not to insult their taste or prevent them from enjoying their chosen activities and if possible, try to keep an open mind about particular tastes you may have overlooked prior to entering into your relationship.
Part Two: Time Making, the Watch you can stop:
Listening: Though for some the ability to stop talking and simply allow their partner to speak may not be an easy task, it is an essential for any good relationship. On the surface such an ability may seem simple, however, the art of listening has many working components: Refraining from interruption or undesired advice, body language that reflects the attitude of someone who is attentively hearing the person who they are listening to and retaining the information given so that it may be recalled at a later time are all constant in an good listener. Too often arguments not only escalate but cannot be resolved simply because one or both partner’s refuse to truly listen.
Taking and interest in their interests: Even if one finds nothing particularly captivating about the hobbies, activities or other interests in their partners life, (though if all of the above apply one might want to reconsider one’s choice in a partner,) to give a reasonable amount of undivided attention to those interests allows one’s partner to feel cared for, to feel attended to or even simply: loved. If one’s partner feels as though they are unable to share any of the burdens or triumphs, however large or small, with their partner the relationship often begins to dissolve in many ways and often a new person is found in which to confide; in some cases this can even be a source of infidelity.
Mighty-Mini Vacations: A day or weekend away from the normal routine can breathe fresh life into a stale relationship no matter how long a couple has been together. Take the time, however busy your life(s) might be to get away and explore both the world and each other. There are times when changes have taken place in one’s partner that were not obvious when buried in a daily routine; discovering these new aspects of one’s partner can at times be like falling in love all over again.
Something Special: Every now and then taking the time to do something truly special for one’s partner is an excellent way to show how much you love them. Expense may impress certain individuals, more often though it is "The thought that counts;" a little money and a great thought can go a long way. Paying close attention to the particular interests one’s partner may have, from collectables to special dining establishments, can be not only a way to show you care, but that you are paying attention to the person your partner is. Bringing any two people together to live each day will inevitably cause conflicts at one time or another, however, with consideration and a willingness to compromise; the stamina to endure these conflicts and continue to work toward a common goal; and finally, the patience, love and understanding of the person with whom you have chosen to share your life; any relationship can be an amazing success and one of the truly miraculous events in your life.
Many years of advice has enabled Alison (Katt) to diagnose specific problems and offer solutions on the subjects of dating and relationships. Visit http://www.villagematchmaker.com to read about helpful tips and submit questions of your own.
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Thursday, June 12, 2008
Still Searching For Your Soul Mate?
By Nilu Jaswal
Picture yourself in a social environment, where there are many strange faces all around you. Then you catch eyes with someone a small distance away from where you are and find yourself thinking to yourself wow I wouldn't mind getting to know that person. The male will self talk himself into thinking 'how can I go up to this lady and just speak to her?' The female will self talk herself into thinking 'I hope this guy will speak to me.' A lot of the time neither have enough self-confidence and ability to 'pick up the signs' that each are sending to each other unconsciously and walk away missing the chance of a potentially beautiful relationship.
Most people don't realise that their internal dialogue does not determine the thoughts that the other person maybe be thinking towards them. A lot of the time when a couple have had a brief encounter with one another and experience a sort of warm feeling inside they are actually thinking the same thoughts with the hopes of the same outcome.
It is in these moments that people should act because they have had an intuitive nudge from within prompting them to make the move. Here we can see that nothing was forced and no one was out there searching diligently for someone. It kind of just happened. You allowed them to come to you, even if you was the one that made the first move.
When people go out to clubs and bars to attempt to 'pull' someone, again they are 'trying' too hard to get attention and often just end up having a fling with regrets the following morning.
Finding love is a natural process and should be treated as such.
Find love here: http://www.self-help-yourself.com/love.html
Your personal attraction guide: http://www.self-help-yourself.com/attraction.html
Be Successful!
Nilu
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Wednesday, June 11, 2008
How to Impress the Girl of Your Dreams
By Gerry Restrivera
Men sometimes find themselves trapped and do not know what to do especially when it comes to the woman who caught their hearts. In the dating scene, if you really like the girl, you may find yourself nervous and do not know what to do to impress the girl of your dreams. Impressing her is not that hard if you know how.
When you met a girl that you really like of course you want to make a good impression and hoping that she will fall for you eventually. To be successful in the dating scene, there are things that you need to learn. You can attract and impress the girl of your dreams if you know the right techniques to be successful in the dating scene. Here are some tips:
Pay attention to your looks. You do not have to be exceptionally handsome and dress like a Hollywood hunk but knowing how to dress well and carry yourself counts if you want to impress the girl of your dreams. Ask a female friend on how to impress the girl of your dreams with your looks. You do not have to wear expensive clothing but wear something in the latest styles that match your identity. You also have to put attention to your hair and wear the type of haircut that fits you and your personality. Practice good hygiene and always appear clean and fresh.
Know what to say, make her laugh and feel comfortable with you. Ever wonder why most average looking men go home with the girl of their dreams? It is because these men know how to talk with women. There are a lot of things to talk about. Talk about your dreams, her hobbies, throw a joke occasionally to break the ice and make her laugh. Listen to her and show interest on what she is saying. To impress the girl of your dreams you should know how to talk, listen and make her laugh.
Chivalry. In today's modern dating scene they say that chivalry is already dead, but prove to her that it is not true. Treat her well, in this modern world that there are women who believe that they can live without men, most women still love to be treated like princesses. Chivalry is still alive and you can impress the girl of your dreams if you treat her well, open doors for her, be courteous and a true gentleman.
Admiring comment. You do not have to say something you do not mean but do not afraid to compliment her. If you find her dress sexy and beautiful then say it. It will give her a good feeling that you appreciate her looks especially her dress, after all some women put so much effort in choosing what to wear on a date. One way to impress the girl of your dreams is to be true and expressive with your admiration.You can impress the girl of your dreams if you know how. There are countless ways on how to leave a lasting impression to women. Do you want to learn the powerful techniques on how to attract and impress the girl of your dreams? Visit How To Be Irresistible To Women
To be irresistible to women visit http://be-irresistible-to-women.blogspot.com/
To know more about love and dating visit All About Relationships
Gerry Restrivera writes informative articles on various subjects including How to Impress the Girl of Your Dreams. You are allowed to publish this article in its entirety provided that author's name, bio and website links must remain intact and included with every reproduction.
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Thursday, June 5, 2008
How to Know If She is in Love With You? 3 Earth Shattering Ways You Simply Can't Afford to Miss
By Pushpa Pal Singh
So does she or does she not? Well this is the question most men ask themselves when they are confused about their partner and do not know whether she truly loves them or not. You see often we tend to get mixed feelings but this does not mean that you can't figure out whether she loves you or not. Read on to discover some of the most effective ways using which you will be easily be able to figure out whether she truly loves you or not......
She is emotionally glued to you- This is a perfect indicator that she is in love with you, you see when a girl seems to love you she would have a high emotional level of involvement with you. She would go on an emotional roller coaster around you which means she would show the extreme of every emotion. Which would be a combination of anger, happiness, love, affection and if she cries a lot when you say something hurtful than she has a very strong attachment with you.
She feels good when she does things for you- She would do favors for you without any personal motive. You see she would do this to make you happy and when you feel happy it would automatically make her happy.
She would match your emotional state- If you are happy she would experience joy and at the same time if you are sad she would feel sad. Her emotions would react according to your emotional state. You see this normally happens when the person truly loves you as that person feels happy when you feel joy and experiences pain when you are going through it.
An absolute must know for you- This secret is an absolute must know for you no matter what. This is the grand daddy of all which would give you the ultimate power to become a magnet towards which every woman would be attracted. This is only known to a few and you are one of the lucky one's who are being introduced to this shocking secret click here- Tell me the Secret
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Tuesday, April 8, 2008
New Powers to Help You Perfect Your Relationships
By Guy Finley
"Since what others may do to us is not in our power to change, we need only concern ourselves with what we do to ourselves... for this is in our power."
There is always a moment before a problem starts with another human being where we realize that what we want is not going to happen. Ordinarily we'll say the other person is about to "ruin my day." But there is, for those of us who want to understand, not only a way for our day not to be ruined, but a way for us to elevate both ourselves and the other person, or at least give them the opportunity to change their lives as well our own.
The nature of change has nothing to do with what another person has done to us. What the other person did presented us with a moment of grace -- the opportunity for us to see that the reason this happened is so that we are moved to where we can take the next step in our life. We can use this painful moment to prove to ourselves that not only has what we've wanted all along not worked, but there exists something that if we change what we want, we can begin to know ourselves at a higher level.
A self-working man or a woman, the person to whom and in whom the Truth begins to become a living force, cannot have a bad day or a bad relationship. It's impossible, because everything that happens to that self-working man or woman is used for the purpose it was created, which is to help the person discover first the condition they're actually in, and then to be moved to read it, and to want the understanding that rests above them.
What happens when we get hurt by another person? We either lash out in the moment we feel hurt, or we run the other way. Have you ever changed another human being by lashing out at them or running away from them? It is not our power to change anyone. All that happens is the experience (that is there to bring us understanding) just keeps repeating itself... over and over again. Our experience always brings us to this moment of truth where we have the possibility of changing what happens to us.
This is what is in our power to do: Whenever someone hurts us, we can put our understanding first and remember that this person cannot do anything different toward us than what he or she understands to do. Simply put, the person who is hurting us is doing the best they know how to do... and no one wants to be punished for their ignorance. The only way that person will ever know what they don't know is when we stop punishing them for it. But here's what we say: "That's not good enough!" Then we try to drag them through a change, which means we resist their negative behavior. And what do we do when someone resists our negative behavior? We just hunker down all the more. So our resistance to their state not only keeps their state alive, but we're convinced that we're different than them, when really it's one secretive relationship perpetuating itself.
In the moment that I feel hurt, I am in a space where I'm upset with you because of what you just did to me. That space wouldn't exist if I weren't standing as a secret opposite to the other person. What I'm looking at and feeling is really me. Therefore, what's mandatory in that moment is to realize that this space that I'm in - meaning my sense of self and all of the relationships that are producing this sense of self - must be abandoned. This is what is in our power to do: Instead of placing our attention on the person that we say has hurt us, we can place our attention and our wish on Love. I intentionally place it on my understanding that, even though I can't see it at the moment, the Love that would free me from this moment exists right there within me, above me.
When I understand that this human being could not do better than they're doing right now, and even though I'm sure they're wrong, they're the worst thing that ever happened... I can realize: that doesn't help me. That doesn't take me to the next level, and I can't make the other person go there... it's impossible. Therefore, I must quit the relationship that seems to be the only possibility at that moment, and join myself to the relationship that I know in my heart stands here even if I can't see it, and I can intend the Truth. I intend to be in relationship with what I know.
This is a key problem for us: I know the Truth is above me, and right now I'm angry and upset, and I don't feel any love at all. But by the same token, I know that what I am feeling is not only conducive to keeping this conflict going, but it's not letting me rise above myself. What I must do is understand that above me sits this Truth, this Love, this Goodness, and here is where I am, and that there exists some relationship between where I am and where I long to be.
Nothing in the universe can prevent a man or a woman who wants to know Love, who wants to reach the next level, from reaching it. The entire universe is set up for the purpose of us realizing our intention. The whole thing is designed for us to succeed at rising. When we understand the true nature of change, we can begin to intend that. It is not necessary to strive to succeed or to blame oneself if one doesn't. As we allow our understanding of the truth about our relationships to guide us, we will change... and we will know the change that we go through was given to us by something above us, and we will continue to long for that until our life is one beautiful upward movement. Truth promises it.
Guy Finley is the acclaimed author of more than 30 books and audio programs on the subject of self-realization, several of which have become international best sellers. His popular works, published in 16 languages, are widely endorsed by doctors, professionals, and religious leaders of all denominations. Among many others, his popular titles include: The Secret of Letting Go, Design Your Destiny, The Lost Secrets of Prayer, Apprentice of the Heart, and Let Go and Live in the Now.
To learn more about the work of Guy Finley and his non-profit Life of Learning Foundation, visit http://www.guyfinley.org for a wealth of free helpful information, free audio and video downloads, and to request your FREE Self-Improvement Starter Kit.
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Thursday, February 28, 2008
Relationship Advice From My Ex-Husband
By Myla Madson
The Internet is full of relationship advice. There are more self proclaimed relationship experts out there than there are couples that are in need of their help. So, I thought I would shine a different light on the subject and present you with...relationship advice from my Ex.
Out of 1,000 men who were asked if they knew what their wife's favorite flower was, 999 of them said, Pillsbury. The other guy said he had no idea, but that if he could get his wife to cook, there would not be any problems in their relationship in the first place.
It's not about the quality of the sex; it's all about the quantity, why can't women get that?
Of course men have "feelings" and "wants"... I want a beer now, I feel like watching football now, I want you naked now, I want you to stop talking now. In fact, men probably have more "feelings" than women do.
It's NOT the dress that makes you look fat.
I think Albert Einstein said it best when discussing why so many marriages fail; "Women marry men hoping they will change. Men marry women hoping they will not. So each is inevitably disappointed". I certainly think men are on the losing side of this equation.
If a woman would look at a potential spouse and ask the question... Is this the guy I want my future children to spend their weekends with? Maybe they wouldn't have so much to complain about all the time.
Men are from Earth, women are from Earth...Deal with it.
If women could apply the same logic they use when informing us guys how stupid it is to watch race cars go around in circles for five hours to the idea of spending fifty bucks to get their nails done every two weeks, the divorce rate could be cut in half.
Before getting married, a man should have a clear idea on what "forever" actually means...sex with the same woman for the rest of your life!
The secret to a successful marriage is to not be around each other to much.
And there you have it. It's clearly evident, at least it is to me, that men and women are different.
Seems so obvious, but when you're in a relationship, many couples often fail to make this distinction and aren't willing to allow the possibility of conflicting views without it turning into a true relationship conflict.
I certainly understand this now but I realize it would not have saved our marriage anyway. The comment that it wasn't the dress that made me look fat, was completely unforgiveable and certainly grounds for divorce!
Want more "Relationship Advice" from the mind of Myla Madson? Check out her new website devoted to herself at http://www.MylaMadson.com
She'll even bribe you with forty of her favorite Italian recipes guaranteed to please any man, just for visiting her website! http://www.MylaMadson.com/italianrecipes
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